The cynic is in

Okay, Andy Rooney here with an old-man rant...

What fucking chick invented men's stretchy-cotton? I hate it! Whatever happened to plain-old coarse, shrinkable, shape-retaining cotton shirts, shorts and pants? Now they need to stretch? Tell you what, next time I need stretchable clothes, I'll change into my sweats, grab a box of tampons [sponsor name name available here for adequate price] and curl up on the couch with my cat and a 5-pound bar of chocolate.